#21 I Hate Michael Vick

I guess this should not come as a surprise to anyone, as he truly is a deplorable character, but I feel that I must express the extent of hatred, so I can move on from constantly dwelling on the deeds of this scum bag.  I should probably explain that my dream job would be something along the lines of president of the ASPCA.  Rob a bank, spend a couple years in the slammer; kick your black lab and it's death row.  There is simply no excuse for this type of behavior, and I will not stand for it.  

All right, so he's quarterback of the Falcons, and was at one time the highest paid player in the NFL.  That just makes it even more pathetic that he spends his spare time watching pitbulls maul each other and then electrocuting and hanging them when they do not perform to his first-class standards.  So this means he's not fighting these dogs as a gangster hoodrat trying to make some extra cash on the side, but he actually takes personal pleasure in seeing innocent animals forced to tear each other apart.  What a fun pastime, Mikey, you sure know how to have a good time.  While some millionaires spend their money on lavish vacations, summer homes, and serious bling, others find it in the kindness of their hearts to donate to charities, helping their fellow countrymen, or even an occasional animal shelter.  On the other hand, we have Big Mike, spending his money to further our nation's animal and drug abuse problems. 

Besides being president of the ASPCA, I wish I could be made chief justice of the Supreme Court, for the sole reason of handling Vick's case.  If I had this opportunity, I would use my powers to bestow upon Vick and his posse the exact treatment they granted to their dogs.  I guess I would give them a little leeway in allowing each person to choose his own execution. These death warrants would include hanging, electrocution, beating, quartering, beheading, stabbing; pretty much, which ever was their favorite to perform on the dog, he shall be bestowed, and then dumped in a ditch.

Am I being too harsh here in my wishful sentencing?  I believe not.  I don't think there are many crimes more pitiful and deranged than animal abuse crimes.  A person who would hurt an innocent animal is truly cracked.  Coming home and finding your wife in bed with another man, and stabbing them both in the heat of the moment is one thing, as is a true sociopath who belongs in a mental institution, murdering a homeless man on the street.  I am by no means saying that these are admissible acts, but for a truly sane NFL quarterback to spend his days off abusing innocent animals is beyond my realm of understanding.  Lucky for him I am a harmless college girl who broods over his actions alone in the comfort of my own home, with no intent of going through law school, or really even getting off the couch for that matter.