#2 I Hate Boys Who Tan

I hate boys who tan.  Boys who tan also seem to share other characteristics that I dislike such as gelled hair, man jewelry, and backwards hats.  Girls who tan are ridiculous enough but now guys? What is this world coming to?  And they usually know they are doing something wrong when heading to the nearest Palm Beach Tan.  On more than one occasion, I have watched a guy look both ways before quietly slipping through the doors and sheepishly requesting 10 minutes in a bed.  Has anyone every seen Sunset Tan on E!?  These guys are the biggest douche bags in all of humanity.  They are perfect representations of the frequent male tanner.  Male tanners are walking contradictions.  They tan, gel their hair, and adorn themselves in pooka shell beads because they care about their appearances like girls do, yet their actions prove far from feminine.  

They are in fact the most appalling and offensive of all specimen.  They strut around bars on college campuses as if they own the place, and any girl would be lucky to be seen walking back to their apartments and frat houses around 3 a.m.  I'm sorry but your $25 Abercrombie pooka shell necklace is not impressive.  It may have been cool to wear when vacationing as a 7th grader in Hawaii, but once again, for a girl, in Junior High School, in Hawaii  And as for gelled hair, literally what is the point?  If you are having that bad of a hair day put on a baseball cap, forward, and call it a day.  Why is it that all creepy people have gel in their hair?  Whether it is that butch lesbian who works at Starbucks and winks at you every morning, or that psycho that shot up NIU, it is a definite symbol of the Creep Party.  

And I guess backward hats are not the end of the world, but to me, they just say, "Look how cool I am," and you're not.  It's hideous.  Girls who are attracted to these guys are worse than the guys themselves.  But I guess they deserve each other.  Have fun with that.